I think at times I can be a little quirky. I think MOST of us can be a little quirky. I like writing that word because it is good to use a letter Q word, and because it is a very descriptive word. Which makes me think there are lots of words out there I could use to describe myself. I am like everyone else, one cannot put Joan in a little non-descriptive box and simply say this is Joan.

I am the woman who loves to write. I love to meet people and talk with people. And like a lot of us, I am comfortable being alone at times. When I was a hospice nurse I was very professional and organized when it came to my career. I wore a nurse’s uniform and looked like a nurse. But when I take my prayer walks I dress very simple and practical and I take on the look of a country girl. When I was growing up with four brothers I was very much a tomboy and I imagine I dressed like a tomboy. Later as a young woman I definitely took on the identity of a flower child, sometimes walking around with the flowing long dresses and flowers in my hair. I still can be a flower child, still loving the flowing dress, loving Mother Earth, and embracing all her gifts. Yet I can be very much a lady and enjoy dressing up. My darling Man, Alan, and I went to Kentucky Center with two friends Thursday night, Kelly and Paul. I dressed in a black top and jacket with black pants and black heels. Not at all like a nurse or a flower child. Just like everyone else in that building I was presenting a different facet of myself, and very comfortable in the role of looking and acting like a lovely lady.

When I am on my prayers walks I dress down, and in the winter I dress very warm. Lately I have been wearing black pants, only these are ski bibs, to help my legs stay warm. I wear a wonderful old, plum colored coat that is a little too big for me so I can layer up underneath it. Sometimes I wear my old, black boots, and I always wear a scarf around my neck and a Green Bay Packer toboggan on my head, and gloves for my hands. Again, the goal is to stay warm. I look nothing like a flower child, though I am still in love with Mother Earth. And I stride out with my legs strong and long, and the last thing on my mind is to walk like a lady in black heels.

Being aware of all these personas I take on helps me be comfortable with myself and move through each day with confidence. And by confidence I mean just that, simple confidence that helps me enjoy my life wherever I go. Arrogance would never serve me and I thank God I have enough life experience to understand that to be humble is a tremendous gift. Being humble enables me to enjoy all kinds of people, all kinds of beings really, because this allows me to be present in the moment and to receive what I am being offered from all forms of life. Besides, I learned decades ago that if I ever decided to take on a personality that “Joan is all that and more”, my Angels will take my ego down a notch or two. My Angels have quite the sense of humor. There are too many stories I could tell on this page, but that is for another day. I am grateful they have taught me many things, one of the most valuable is the ability to laugh at myself.

The most recent lesson I learned was just a few days ago when the country girl Joan was out on a cold late morning prayer walk with Reddogg. I was wearing all the old comfortable clothes I described above and we had walked about a mile and one-half. I had also joined in my weight class at the Y that morning and had swam my one-half mile in the pool. Well, I suddenly got tired. I know all the best warm and dry places in the fields around here. I ‘ve been walking them for thirteen years. So I decided it was a good time to lie down and rest, something I do at least one time each of the four seasons. I walked across the field to a little hollow, or dip in the field, a great spot so no one could see me from the road. It was somewhat close to the neighbor’s house that owned the field, but facing the garage, so it felt very private. As I laid back on the dry grass I asked my Angels to “come tend to me”, a request I have learned to periodically speak up about since I was thirty-nine years old. I remember that first time so well, down by a local park, and I had been bone tired, my shoulders heavy with so much responsibility in my life. I fell asleep then, too. You know, I am sure I was dreaming but I could honestly feel those light touches of my Angels’ hands on my shoulders, on my muscles, on my forehead. I woke up so refreshed!

So falling asleep was old hat to me, with Reddogg lying beside me. I don’t know how long I had been asleep, but I was awakened by a male voice, “Are you OK? Hey! Are you alright?”

So I sat up and immediately recognized my neighbor Dale. Reddogg walked straight to him, wagging his tail, so happy to see him.

“Oh, Joan. It’s you out here. I saw someone laying out here in the field and just wanted to make sure everything was ok. I was working at my desk and told my co-worker to hold on a few minutes while I stepped outside.”

I couldn’t believe it. This was the first time someone had found me out here lying in the grasses. Dale was a retired police officer and obviously very observant. I noticed he had his phone in his hand.

“Dale! I am so sorry to interrupt your work day. I was just taking a little nap.” I stood up as I was talking then reached out and gave him a quick hug. We had been neighbors for years.

Dale laughed and with his hand made a sweeping motion across the field.

“Go back to sleep. It’s all good. Make yourself at home.”

He turned then and headed back home, putting his phone up to his ear.

“No problem, ” I heard him say. “It’s just my neighbor Joan sleeping out here in the field.”

Of course I could not hear what the person on the other end of the phone was saying. But I can certainly imagine!

“Sleeping out in the field! It’s forty degrees out there! What kind of QUIRKY person does that?”

Even as I write this I am laughing at myself. At myself and at my neighbor’s response! How’s that for southern hospitality? “Go back to sleep…make yourself at home!” Out in the field! You know what? I sure will. I’ll get tired and lie my quirky self down in the grasses again. It’s a part of who am. :O)

c   Love, Joan